


Teatime

by asocialconstruct



Category: Starfighter (Comic), The Teahouse
Genre: Crack, Fluff, M/M, gratuitous snuggling, maybe some cross dressing later
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-24
Updated: 2012-09-25
Packaged: 2017-11-15 00:04:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/520921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asocialconstruct/pseuds/asocialconstruct
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cain and Abel read webcomics together, apparently.  Kind of a crossover.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This started out as a joke from Kurnai-tenka's Totally Serious Abel Tweets and spiraled out of control from there. I've already written mpreg, I have no shame or dignity left.

  


Cain was at the room for once, reading something on his tablet as Abel closed the door.  Abel started getting ready for bed, Cain ignoring him as he read.

“What are you reading?” Abel asked, coming to bed.  Colorful, not an official report or anything like what Cain usually flicked through.

“Nothing,” Cain snapped, trying to turn off his tablet before Abel could see.

“Show me,” Abel said, leaning over him, trying to see.  Cain held it away from him, pushing Abel away with the other hand, but Abel knelt next to him.  “Are you reading porn?  Let me see, it has to be good if you don’t want me to see.”  

Abel tackled him then, laying Cain out and straddling him to get at the tablet.  Cain lay flat on his back on the mattress, holding the tablet out as far as he could so Abel had to lay across him to try to reach for it, Cain’s hand on his ass trying to distract him.  But it had to be good, if Cain wanted to keep him from seeing it, looking as annoyed and embarrassed as he ever did, so Abel squirmed against him, determined to get it.

He got it away from him then, sitting back up as Cain pushed him off with a sour look.  

Abel frowned down at it, not at all what he’d expected.  Teenage boys, one black haired, one pink haired.  Hugging.  “Are you reading a _comic_?  A _romance_ comic?”

Cain laughed and got his cigarettes out.  “Not exactly.”

“Is it any good?”

“Read it and find out, since you were so fucking hot and bothered to find out.  ’s about a teahouse.”

Abel gave him an annoyed look and sat against the wall, flicking back to the beginning.  Sex, almost immediately.  “This isn’t about tea!” Abel said, looking up as he blushed.

Cain just snorted.  “Like you’ve never seen cock before, princess.  Give it back if you’re not going to read it.”

“I didn’t say I wasn’t going to read it,” Abel mumbled, blushing deeper.  He guiltily flicked to the next page.

Cain laughed and settled next to him against the wall, smoking and reading over his shoulder as Abel read from the beginning.  Abel blushed again when Cain murmured against his ear that he should have made Abel do like poor Rory in front of Reed their first time, but otherwise Cain just sat with his arm over Abel’s shoulders and told him not to click through pages so fast.

And then it was done, part way through a chapter.  “That’s all?” Abel asked as Cain ground out his third cigarette and put the tablet away finally.

“‘nother page next week, don’t get your panties in a twist, princess,” Cain said, pushing Abel over to lie across him and suck his ear.  “Could always do a little dressup if you need more.  You’d look cute as Claret,” he murmured, giving Abel’s neck a warm lick.

“But Mercutio has better outfits.”

“What,” Cain snapped, sitting up to glare down at Abel.  “No.”

“But how am I supposed to do Claret without, you know, cleavage?  I want to do Mercutio.”

“Don’t need the tits with your legs, princess, it’s all in the skirt,” Cain said, leaning back down to bite Abel’s neck and run a hand up the inside of his thigh.

“You do Claret then, you’ve got the legs for a little skirt too.”

Cain snorted.  “No,” he said into Abel’s neck with a little bite.  “If we’re doing cross, I’d do Argent.  Then I’ll give you a little spanking in your frilly skirt and pigtails.”

Abel laughed, half-heartedly pushing Cain off him.  “Don’t need to dress up for that.  But why don’t you be Axis and I’ll be Rhys and I can give you the spanking?” Abel said, just to needle Cain.

And it worked.  “You little shit, I’ll show you who gets spanked—“ Cain said, dragging the rest of Abel’s clothes off him.


	2. Chapter 2

“Why the fuck do you get to be Argent?” Cain whined, lying across the bed at the hotel as Abel got ready.

“Because I made the costumes and you weren’t helpful.  Buying yourself new earrings to play Axis doesn’t count as helping.”  Abel concentrated on ironing his hair straight, trying to get it to lie flat.  Cain rolled his eyes and chewed his nicotine gum, the only thing Abel had let him pack for the weekend of shore leave.  

Abel had taken care of the rest.

“Well, you look as creepy as Argent does,” Cain said after a while, watching him put in his red contact lenses.

Abel glared at him.  “I thought you _liked_ Argent.  Go put on yours, we’re going to be late to meet Deimos.”

“Don’t need to fucking get ready, just a shirt and pants,” Cain mumbled, grabbing the garment bag down from the hanger.  Abel tried not to smile too much as Cain wrestled it into the bathroom, the garment bag taking up more space than it should have for the Axis outfit he’d promised Cain.

Abel straightened his coat in the mirror, counting off the seconds.

“What the fuck is this?” Cain yelled through the bathroom door.  “Abel, you little shit, I’m going to fucking _kill_ you for this—“

“Well too bad, you can kill me and go naked because there’s nothing else that’ll fit you,” Abel yelled back.  “That’s what you get for not helping with costumes when you knew how much work it was.  Do you want to pout naked all weekend instead?”  

Rustling in the bathroom; Cain was either destroying it or putting it on.  

Abel tried and failed to keep a straight face when Cain finally opened the door, pulling his green wig on crookedly.  “Maybe,” Cain muttered, coming out of the bathroom, frowning down at his skirt and trying to smooth the ruffles down.

“Turn around and let me lace you up,” Abel said, putting his arm around Cain’s waist, his sword bumping Cain in the ribs.  Cain turned, glaring at Abel in the mirror and pressing his ass up against Abel’s crotch.  “Not helpful,” Abel snapped, slapping Cain’s thigh under the ruffles to make him straighten up.

Cain held his arms up, grumbling, and hissed when Abel pulled the laces.  “Fuck, not so tight, Abel.”

“It looks good on you,” Abel said, standing back from him.  Cain was too skinny to be Claret, but he had the legs for the short skirt, and he’d even put on the spike heels Abel had put in the bag.  Weeks of measuring Cain’s flight suits paid off, Cain’s ass only barely covered by the short skirt.  Abel tried not to look too pleased with himself.  “You have nice legs.”

“I hate you.”

“No you don’t,” Abel said, standing on tiptoes to kiss him, still shorter than Cain even though Abel’s boots had heels because Cain’s were taller.

Cain kissed him back, watching the image of them reflected back in the mirror out of the corner of his eye.  Cain put an arm over Abel’s shoulders, towering over him in the spike heels, half-turning to check out his own ass in the mirror.  “That was pretty hot.  Argent should totally bang Claret in the comic.”

“Deimos is downstairs, he’s got his camera with him if you want a picture of us kissing,” Abel said, his arm around Cain’s waist, slimmed down in the corset.

Cain glared down at him, shaking his head, green curls everywhere.  “No.  Fuck no.”  Abel tried not to smile as he reached up to adjust Cain’s green wig back in place.

“Well come on anyway, he’s been working on his Gilder outfit for ages.  And you have to stop pouting for long enough to get a picture with Emi and CC anyway, so you might as well let Deimos take a picture of us too.”

“Fuck. No.”  Cain glowered but went for the door first, more confident than Abel had thought he’d been in the tall heels.  Much more confident.  Abel couldn’t tell if Cain was intentionally swinging his hips or not.

“You’re pretty good at that, you sure you haven’t been practicing?” Abel asked as he locked the door behind them.  Cain took a swipe at him, but Abel pushed him up against the wall to kiss, Cain only biting back a little, pushing back into the kiss.  Until Abel slapped his ass under the short skirt and took off running down the hall.

Cain could walk in those heels, but he couldn’t run.


End file.
